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AN ALTERNATIVE REALITY -or- FINGER WAGGING
You can have a great night/day out and successfully ignore the following points, which aim to give some balance or the 'other side' of a weekend out clubbing (call me a cynical old frump)...
• The larger clubs are enormous. Don't arrange to meet any one in there, it just does not happen - If you are going to the toilet and do not want to lose your friends, take your group with you. At least someone can guard the drinks (which are not allowed in toilets) while you are dealing with nature...
• Different nationalities expect different things from a night out. Attitudes can be come even more polarised on the gay scene, some will dress up, with PRADA dripping from every handle, other will whip their shirt off at the first opportunity.
• The sound systems are great, and the acoustics can be good to appalling. Don't be ashamed to wear earplugs, (take some just in case.)
• Bar service can be SLOW in high season, if not impossible - do not wait until you are totally dehydrated before buying a bottle of water.
• There are almost always queues (lines) for the toilets.
• Water is prohibitively expensive - take loads of cash.
• Always try to get a free wrist band entry from the club parades - otherwise you will not be able to afford the water.
• The straights out-number gays, 1000s to 1.
• 'Anthems' grow. They mature in August/Sept. The CD you bought in the airport may well not represent anything that you have heard in the clubs. (The are produced months in advance of the clubs opening.)
• GAY nights: Can be impossible to distinguish from any other night.
• Road warning: The road separating Amnesia and Privilege is dangerous at the best of times, impossible in the dark and lethal if you are off your face. It has now been upgraded into a motorway, with a crash barrier that you will have to jump over if you are taking public transport to Amnesia/Privilege.
• Although no club has yet, to public knowledge, been evacuated in a hurry, some Ibiza clubs appear to let in far more punters than fire regulations in any sane country would allow. So, know where the emergency exits are.
• As in most cities/resorts in the world, clubbers are, on the whole, off their face - ever been the only sober person at a party and not got the joke?.
• Even paid for tickets will not gurantee entry to opening parties. (Neither does sponsoring an event...) Get there early!
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